A Quick Note To Erik Spoelstra

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Hey Erik,

Since the NBA is in lockout mode (and congratulations to the World Champion Lynx) and no one else has anything to really say - they're talking about whether or not you're going to get your contract extension, and I just wanted to let you know that melding talent together isn't easy - I mean hey - look at me - I have tons of talent (not for anything useful but that's beside the point...) and it's hard enough just getting my one and only ass out the door on time and not getting lost on my way to work after I miss my exit because I spilled coffee on myself.

I can't even being to imagine the pressure on you and trying to coach a team to an NBA championship with so many different personalities.

But don't worry.

No te preocupes ban toi.

If you don't get that extension and you find yourself jobless - I know one career you can completely go into.


Seriously - people would love to see you in your own personal sex tape shaking that Fil Am ass like you're going for the slam dunk ready to get hardcore on a bevy of beautiful porn vixens.

I even have a title if you're interested.

Erik Spoelstra: Hardwood.


Hope to see you on Blu-ray soon.



Sorry - I just couldn't resist that title...